Well maybe one or two anyhow... I'm gonna run out of parts to donate to science soon though, I swear!!
Have been getting asked all day if I'm worried about this surgery. Honestly, the answer is no - not really. We've been so wrapped up in the med-drama of our loved ones lately that I really hadn't given it a lot of thought. Though a few well meaning nurses in Vancouver kept telling me I was crazy for putting off my surgery and if it burst I'd be dead ~ but a few well placed "I only have one DAD, I can always book another surgery!" made it clear they weren't getting anywhere with that line of conversation and it stopped.
You know me, I've never had any trouble putting *me* last on the list.. It was a wee bit of a shock to realize Monday that this long anticipated surgery had kind of snuck up on us while we weren't thinking about it.
In all honesty, I don't anticipate any problems. In fact, if they can do it laperoscopically I could even be home tomorrow night!
Can't help that little voice in the back of my head though that wonders if that lucky horseshoe that lives up my arse is gonna pull me through one-more-time.. hardly seems fair or just this trip I've been on since I got Ovarian cancer for my birthday all those years ago.. but I suppose without those crappy times I wouldn't appreciate all the great things in my life nearly as much as I do. I have gleaned more medical knowledge than I ever wanted but some of that sure came in handy during our stint as hospital groupies over the last few months.
I was remembering today sitting in Pre-Op waiting for that first cancer surgery, and berating myself for all the things i had on my list that I wasn't sure if I'd get the chance to do. So many times over the years I've had that conversation with myself - how many times do you have to be told "You almost died" or "You're lucky to be alive" before you get working on the bucket list? Seriously though - what did you expect - I am after all a natural born BLOND. <G>
Not much of this life has gone according to "plan" but I have finally attained some of the goals that I'd chosen for myself way back in high school. Amusing to me how many of the fundemental "Wants" although tweaked a little over the years haven't really changed much.
Someone reminded me the other day of one of the first events I'd covered for BNTV ~ upon arrival I'd overheard someone say "Oh good local media has begun to arrive" and I'd turned around to look and see who had come." just as I realized that *I* was who they were referring to - OOPS! In my heart I will always be a people-loving multi-hat wearing chatterbox ~ all the rest is icing on the proverbial cake.
Though many of the gifts received came when I wasn't expecting them, and looked a lot different than what I thought I'd ordered there is no question that someone out there was looking out for me. I am truly blessed. I cannot help but be grateful for that.
I have a wonderful man, 3 great kids, and a few awesome friends and colleagues to call my own. I even have a few family members willing to admit that we are related - Life is good. :)
Here's hoping that in a few weeks we'll all look back on these past few months and look back on it as a distant shot in the rearview mirror.. I said it at 24 years old upon receiving news of the big C and I'll say it again today at 42 ~ I'm not *done* so don't count me out just yet.
My to-do list is so long, I'm gonna live forever.. <3
